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I never know how to get out of not spending too much. My brother has a good job and a bulging bank account. His gifts are always extravagant. He thinks nothing of spending two or three hundred dollars on a flower arrangement for Mom. I spend as much as I can spare and often more than I can spare. My gifts still look pathetic next to his though and make me feel small.What can I do to balance it out more so I don't look so bad?
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Pennywise, I would bet that the only one that thinks you look bad is you. Your Mom won't mind how much you spend. It's the thought that counts. I agree with Kay, a quiet word with your brother is a good idea.
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I'd look at it this way. When my kids give me anything I don't care about how much they paid for it. I care that they chose or made the gift with love and me in mind. My most precious gift is a handmade card with "I love you, Mommy" written by my son the first year he'd learned to write. No thousand dollar gift could take the place of that in my heart. Your gifts to your Mom won't mean any less to your Mom than your brother's, pennywise. I guarantee it. :)
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Kay, Jewel and purplerain, thanks very much for the advice. You made me feel a whole lot better about the whole thing! I'm seeing my brother this weekend and will speak to him about this. My mother would be horrified to know this was how I felt, I know it.
Purplerain, this part of your post, " I care that they chose or made the gift with love and me in mind." I know Mom would feel the same.
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Purplerain, this part of your post, " I care that they chose or made the gift with love and me in mind." I know Mom would feel the same.
That's what you'll need to keep in mind to tell your brother too, pennywise. Emphasise to him that he doesn't need to spend a fortune to show he loves her. I know men who can only express themselves through presents and would have a fit if they had to say the L word. It could be your brother is one of those.
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Purplerain, this part of your post, " I care that they chose or made the gift with love and me in mind." I know Mom would feel the same.
That's what you'll need to keep in mind to tell your brother too, pennywise. Emphasise to him that he doesn't need to spend a fortune to show he loves her. I know men who can only express themselves through presents and would have a fit if they had to say the L word. It could be your brother is one of those.
So you've met my family Savannah LOL. For my dad to say that you'd need to be on your deathbed or he on his. Seriously, that was a good point you stated. Let us know how it all goes, pennywise.
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How about approaching your brother and asking him to tone the gift giving spending down a level or two? I find people that have cash to splash around don't think for a minute how their actions make another person feel uncomfortable. It doesn't cross their mind.
The best way for a person to have happy thoughts is to count his blessings and not his cash. ~Author Unknown